real

january 2025: the classics

the only picture I've grabbed of outside this month...

I've been thinking on what to write about ever since I made my first post. I'm having trouble deciding a direction on what I want to do on this platform.

My previous websites were personal, with stories of what I've been up to, what I like, what I'm thinking. But sharing myself in that way now, as an adult who has to contend with a digital footprint... It's a little scarier than being a toddler asked how their day was for the whole world wide web to check on.

There's a lot of vulnerability in sharing yourself, especially when it's deliberately through art. Every single character and keystroke and color choice can be an impression made from one human to another. And in the nature of it, you don't get to choose how the other person interacts or reacts to it. You have to just be and let be. That's something that takes a lot of strength, in my opinion. To know and accept yourself and be confident enough that other people may or may not accept you in mind. And then to share anyway.

I could do thoughtful posts like this. Or I could do sillier stuff like share this picture from the grocery store the other day.

Misplaced FatBoy juniors for maybe $9.49. They're purposefully smaller but go big or go hungry?

All of it gets stuck on the internet forever even when it disappears forever. My blog posts from my infancy are still miraculously archived, though my parents stopped paying for the domain long ago. I go back to read my parent's websites once in a while too. Cute stuff, silly stuff, difficult stuff. They haven't thought about it in decades, but I still care.

So what am I to offer you? What am I willing to give in pursuit of caring for you through my screen, and what can I do to fill up my heart too?

Maybe this song from one of my favorite bands that I can't actually figure out how to take off of the post since I'm on mobile?

At the end of it, I guess all I can hope for is that the content that I'm generating by trying to commit to myself and my wallet (domain/hosting) is something that brings joy and sparks insight to someone, somehow. Maybe even some delight.

Hope you keep well for yourself. 🫶